Just in case you were wondering...

I don't care for Beyonce.

That is all.

No, it's not. While I'm at it, I don't care for:

fire smoke: it's currently invading my house!
laziness
coconut/grapes: texture issue
that horrible feeling after you eat/drink too much
gory movies
arrogance
loud people
the color orange
wasps
reality romance shows
big hoop earrings (those are for whores)
names that don't follow the rules of grammar

All of the above things are unnatural.

X Marks the Spot

In case you didn't know this about me, I'm a huge X-Files fan. Even to this day. Like, years after the series ended. Cigarette-Smoking Man is the bomb (see my blog title, hellooooo?!?!?!?!)

Tonight will probably be a marathon night. Right now, it's the first movie (co-starring John Locke!!!) Next, who knows?

I could watch this stuff all night.

/nerd rant

ZOO-BI-LEE ZOO

Good grief. I am glad to be home. I am a 100% homebody. I just am.

We really did have a fun weekend on our zoo trip, though. Hannah enjoyed taking the camper out and seeing all of the animals. For the adults, we had plenty to talk about (scenery-wise) and the beer flowed freely (therefore, a good time is guaranteed if you know us...).

Let me just say this about campgrounds: there sure are some skanky people in this world (i.e...lady in pink, lady in black, lady in (insert your own color here).

Let me just say this about the zoo: there sure are a lot of monkeys who like to show (and scratch) their butts.

Let me just say this about staying in a camper: I've never been so glad to see my own bathroom.

But really, we did have a lot of fun. I just wish we could have found out what was going on in that little red barn at the campground. There was obviously more than met the eye at that place...

A Doubly Happy Birthday

Yesterday was my baby's 7th birthday!!!! woah. holy cow. wow. man. omg.     -_-

This means one thing. I'm old.

She celebrated by choosing to eat at chick-fil-a and playing in the play land with her cousins in the shortest, tiniest dress that she owns. But it was her birthday, so she could wear whatever she wanted (by her own reasoning).

She also celebrated by measuring my double chin, which she has recently become obsessed with. She compared it to the one owned by that really big girl on Glee. She was convinced mine was larger.
I quote "I'm not trying to be mean mama, but it's kinda big. But it's a cute double chin because you're my sweet mama." I wasn't sure if I was supposed to say thanks and give her a hug, or cry...so I just sat there and looked at her...then the girl on TV...then the mirror.

Needless to say, I got up early this morning and hit the elliptical for a couple of miles.

Now, we're going to the zoo, so she should shoot out some real gems over the course of the next few days. I'll be sure to share them.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KID!

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.9

Fix yo mouth!

I don't appreciate people who look like Lips Manlis from Dick Tracy.

I just....don't.

Rambling (Wo)man

I kinda just realized I don't do any musing on this blog. I just ramble.

Let me ramble about my weekend highlight: I bought my wedding dress!

Now you must know, I am not a "traditional" person or an emotional one, so it was not the "traditional" dress buying experience. No oooohs and aaaahs, just went and found what I was looking for. I didn't even leave the dressing room in any dresses I tried on. I'm not like those silly girls out there parading around and twirling on those little pedestals in front of their crying mothers, sisters, maids of honor, and college roomates. It was the freaking bridal MART, for crying out loud, not Kleinfelds. Uhhh! There were no cameras rolling. This was not going to be televised on TLC in dramatic, suspense-filled, fake fashion. But more power to those beaming 21 year olds who have no idea what they are getting into. And a special shout out to the girl in the stall (what? I told you it was the MART, no fancy individual closed off rooms here) next to me, who had been engaged for a grand total of about 3 days...literally. Holy hell! What is so wrong with a long engagement? Not necessarily 6 years like me, but come on! 3 days? She'll be divorced in a year. But she'll have the dress of her dreams, haha.

Gotta go, The Bachelorette is on. I hate this show. It's ridiculous.

Oh wait, it just ended. DANG....

I'm a fatty...and other musings

You know what I hate? That full, bloaty, swollen, miserable feeling after you eat waaaaay to much. Then, because you feel so guilty about it, you exercise like a maniac...on a full stomach. Then, because you exercised, you feel the need to chug a little protein water...that always hurts your stomach.

Needless to say, my stomach is hurting a little bit right now.

On an unrelated note, here's what a full-on gangsta looks like playing T-ball:

  (by gangsta I mean her shirt's untucked)

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.9

Whaaaaaat?

Hello....what's this? Why, it's my new Anne of Green Gables dvd, arriving fresh from Amazon. I can't wait to curl up with this bad boy for about three hours Friday night.

All of this leads me to something you may not know about me...I'm a little bit of a nerd. It could be all those hours I spent watching the news and PBS as a kid. but it was probably really just all that dirt and charcoal I ate back in the day.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.9

Hi There Good Lookin'....

Tonight I rekindled an old love affair...with my elliptical. Even if it was but for one brief mile while Hannah grabbed a bath, it was a mile of bliss. I think we will have to steal a few minutes tomorrow to catch up ;-)

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.9

I Suck At This

Everyday I think of something really awesome to blog about. Then, I come home...and I don't blog about it. I need to do a better job with that.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.9